Sisters

Sisters

Friday, April 28, 2017

New Mercies Every Morning



Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.  They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.  Lamentations 3:22-23

        That is my favorite promise from the Lord.  It’s the one I need most, His grace and mercy that comes new each day. 
        Lily has been home now for 667 days.  Sometimes it still seems so surreal.  We were apart for 1,159 days.  Those days were long, stretched out and felt as if a part of our family was missing for each photo, vacation, holiday, milestone, etc… There are some mornings I walk into her room to get her up, and I remember what it felt like to walk into that empty room waiting for her.  It was some very lonely years waiting.  If I had only known to rest a little more in the waiting…     
        She turns 5 today.  The second birthday spent with us, and the first official birthday as a Dobson!  I am finding I like the second milestones, the second holidays better.  As a new mom you always look forward to the first birthday, the first thanksgiving, the first Christmas, their first Easter, and that first mother’s day.  Not gonna lie…all those first with Lily were tough.  Don’t get me wrong, we rejoiced, we were joyful she was home, but some of those “first” were tough, even painful for all involved!  I have a picture of my first mother’s day with her home.  Lily’s favorite Sunday school teacher did a wonderful craft for us moms and they snapped a picture of us together as we entered Sunday school.  Little did they know neither of us wanted a picture with the other that Happy Mother’s Day morning.  Bonding issues had taken its toll.  Control issues had taken its toll.  The pain of all she was going through physically, medically and emotionally had taken its toll, on her and me.  I keep that picture over my sink as a reminder of where we have been, where we want to go and what kind of mother she needs me to be.  To say the last 968 days have been wonderful, joyful and pleasant would be a lie.  There have been wonderful, joyful and pleasant moments, days and weeks, but there has also been anger, disappointment, and pain.  But through it all the Lord has never left our side.  And each morning His mercies were new, are new and will continue to be new.  For those of you that know Lily, you know she is fierce, bold, determined and full of life!  But she has also experienced pain, physically and emotionally.  She lost everything she knew to be comforting, even if it wasn’t good and ideal.  She lost control of her world, the only world she knew and was placed into a world of strangers, who didn’t even look and talk like her.  She had rules and a new way of life and even if that new way of life was better some days it just wasn’t for her.  However, with each new day comes growth, grace and mercy.
        For 667 days she has leveled everything I knew about parenting, love, grace, mercy, forgiveness and peace.  She has broken down every barrier I had ever put up and challenged me in ways I never thought could happen.  With each 2nd holiday we feel more like family.  We know each other.  We’ve been through life together.  We know what the other wants and needs.  With each surgery I see our bond deepening and her dependence on us growing.  This last surgery showed me just how far she had come.  As we talked the night before about what to expect we talked about pain, about how the hurting brings healing and joy.  And as she held me tight she said, “Momma, all this makes me want to cry.”  And as I looked at her I said, “Me too baby, me too.”  If she only knew how many tears I’ve cried for her, tears of pain and joy.  The next day she woke up with a smile on her face and said, “Let’s go to the hospital, I’m ready!”  And she was.  Her big, brave self underwent her sixth surgery like a champ. 
          For roughly the last 4oo some odd days she has had some sort of contraption on her legs.  I’ve watched her legs slowly be unfolded from the mangled, tangled way they were to beautiful straight legs she is so proud of.  This process didn’t come without pain though.  Much like her physical pain, this whole journey hasn’t come without pain.  She has endured much more than we will ever know, but one thing she has taught me is to have joy among the pain.  Sometimes you just have to force joy to deal with pain, and that’s a choice.  This kid of mine forces me to be better, for her.  She challenges me for the better.  She expects me to love deeper, because that’s what makes her better. 
        It’s hard for me to put into words with this kid means to me.  I have two remarkable daughters, one from my womb and one given to me by another. They are so different yet so much alike.  They will change this world, they have already changed mine.  I don’t have this whole parenting thing down by any means, but Lily has taught me I’m teachable, and the Lord is teaching me what she needs and how to parent that.  She is healing in more ways than one.  I’m celebrating this birthday with her differently this year, because this year we are in a different season of life!  She is my daughter and she has been from the day the Lord told me she was mine…go fight for her. 
        When I reminded her it was getting close to her birthday a couple of weeks ago she looked puzzled.  Then she asked, “I get another birthday, again?”  Yes, baby you do.  You get many many more!  We get to do life together now, birthdays, holidays, surgeries, no more doing life alone.  You are now a part of a family.  A family that loves you, that will fight for you and with you.  A family that will go the distance with you, and regardless of circumstance will seek out joy and live it with you!  Lily Belle you have changed my life, in all the ways I needed.  You broke me to the core.  You were everything we never knew we wanted or needed and have come to be the very thing that glued our family together.  You my dear will conquer because the Lord has His hand on you.  Verse 26 of Lamentations chapter 3 is what I’m now praying for you…It is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.  I can’t wait for the day you realize all the Lord has done for you, and the day you accept Him as your Lord and Savior.  Until then we wait…but this time we are together! 

Happy 5th birthday little one, you are a whole hand now, and still full of dynamite!            

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